Even when we are actively trying to keep out negativity, it seems that toxic people find their way into our lives. They appear for different reasons – because they want something, they’re looking for someone to wallow with, complain to or mooch off of, or they have some greater agenda. Often times we don’t know how toxic someone is until they’ve made their way into our lives and found a place there, and they’ve been slowly pushing their negative energy our way the whole time. Here are five ways you might be attracting toxic people into your life without even realizing it.
1. You’re a Good Listener
Being a good listener is a great quality to have, but it can also be an invitation for someone toxic to enter your life. Negative people can use it as an opportunity to unload on you, whining and complaining about every aspect of their life. They aren’t worried about you arguing with them or telling them you’d rather not talk. It shouldn’t be too hard to pinpoint a toxic person when they start telling you all of the reasons why they’re unhappy or why life is unfair. Excuse yourself and do your best to avoid them in the future.
3. You Trust Easily
A toxic person can most easily snake their way into the life of someone who is open and trusting. They expect that a trusting person is less likely to question their actions or intentions, so they can get away with more. Being open-minded is a great quality to have, but be careful not to ignore your instincts when it comes to those with bad intentions.
3. You Are Generous
Generous people are magnets to people who are toxic. They see generosity as a way to get what they want. If you notice that a new “friend” is constantly forgetting their wallet, needing a ride or borrowing your things, they’re most likely taking advantage of your kindness. Share your generosity with your family and true friends, but don’t extend it to those who want to use it for their own gain.
4. You’re Easy-going
It’s great to be laid back and easy-going, but your go-with-the-flow personality can attract toxic people if you’re not careful. If you’re fun and outgoing, you’re probably less likely to be aggressive during conflict, so a toxic person might think you’ll give them another chance, even if you find out they’ve betrayed you in some way.
5. You Choose to See the Good in Everyone
If you choose to give people the benefit of the doubt, you are probably more likely to be blinded by a toxic person’s hidden agenda. It’s great to see the good in people, but be careful not to let that blind you to what someone is really doing. Even when you find out what’s going on, you might hold on to the idea that a toxic person can change, even though they continue to hurt you and use you. It’s important to know when to cut someone out of your life.